Never Have To work Again

This one has been floating around in my little brain for a couple of weeks. A number of thoughts and/or events, lately, have necessitated the inevitable. This particular post may be the most difficult idea I've yet to address. But, money is a little tight right and now and this goofy exercise really is cheaper than therapy.

The genesis of this topic goes back nearly five years. In December of 2010, I woke up on the morning after completing the White Rock Marathon and I could not move my body at all. There was a soreness that is impossible to describe. Work was out of the question as was the thought of getting out of bed.

I knew a former high school classmate in Flower Mound who owned a medical massage clinic. On a whim, I gave her a call and she offered to get me back on my feet if I thought I could get into her office.

The Flower Mound Miracle Worker (as I now refer to her) did indeed back up her claims and after a brief massage and some of that voodoo kinesio tape, I was back upright and well on my way to recovery.

During the session, the Miracle Worker, whom I had not seen in years, told me her story about getting into that line of work. Then she said, "Once I found my passion, I've never had to work again."

What? Never had to work again? I've had to work every stinking day of my life! This seemed a little unfair.

Yesterday, I was driving down I35, thinking about the Miracle Worker, and the sentiment she expressed that day. I was wrestling with the idea of writing a post about it. But I was fairly certain that I'm not  quite ready to be THAT transparent. Then the "blow hard" Talk Radio Host said in that same instant, "Well, you know what they say. Once you find your passion, you never have to work again."

Are you kidding me? Coincidence? Maybe. Maybe not!

I know that during the past few weeks, I've found myself reflecting on the decision of a year ago, to NOT pursue my passion.  Consequently, for the past year, I've continued to work every day, just as I have since getting out of college. Work! Drudgery! No passion! Only burden. My only relief comes when, in meditation, my little Tibetan Monk reminds me of "shared human experience." And I hope, that many of you have to go to work everyday, too!

Intellectually, I know why I backed out of that preaching gig and I am still fairly certain, that it was the right decision at that particular time. But that doesn't always squelch the chorus of "shoulda, coulda, wouldas" that take over my thinking mind on almost a daily basis.

One of my spiritual advisers, the Eyetalian, explained to me that many folks do have a fear of success! I find that notion offensive and I nearly smacked the smirk off his face! Who knows? He could be right. Trust me. there is no need to ask him if he thinks he is right.

Maybe Fear of Success will be a post in the near future.....

Meanwhile, I need to get back to WORK!

The Problem Is So Warm and Squishy

Imagine this scene. I'm sitting out by the pool, at a fairly decent hotel, in St. Thomas, U.S.V.I. Oh, the good part? It was a church trip. (Some churches simply do a better job of picking their mission points than others). I am in full fledged RANT to an Elder in that church. In my mind, he was one of the wisest men I've ever known and one of only two or three elders, in my entire lifetime, that I would give 50 cents for.

He actually listened. He did not interrupt. He did not roll his eyes. He was attentive. He let me wear myself down, until I was nearly out of breath. Then, he said, "Well, Kevin. Are you gonna be part of of the problem or part of the solution?"

That conversation happened THIRTY YEARS ago, and I dare say that a week has not passed, in those thirty years, that his question has not haunted me. And except for a few brief periods in my life, I have made the conscious decision to be a part of the PROBLEM.

Staying in the problem is where I'm most comfortable. The problem is familiar to me. It's just like a fresh meadow muffin, dropped by a Jersey cow. It's warm. It's squishy. And I just settle down in it, and lay there, completely unaware of the foul odor that surrounds me.

I just had a lousy week! Starting with last week's post and the realization of just how powerless I am, I spent the entire week spiralling down into the abyss of of GROSS intolerance. I have never seen it more clearly. When I don't feel in control, and the powerlessness is so prevalent, I simply cannot abide you! NONE of you! IDIOTS! After a somewhat emotional weekend last weekend, and the resulting realizations that arose from that, I spent the entire week bumping into, talking to, and conferring with IDIOTS!

Then, seemingly without provocation, those silly cliches pour in. "If you spot it, you got it!" "By the time you've encountered your 3rd idiot of the day, you might want to look in the mirror."

I hate the cliches. They torment me! But, interestingly, they are STILL the problem. Very little solution in taping the problem to the bathroom mirror. It's still the problem!

I'm not in the solution yet. So I dare not try to address it. The solution will have to be addressed in a future post.

Meanwhile, I will just lay back and relax in the problem. So warm! So squishy!

God Doesn't Have Grandkids

It sure is easy to say. Just rolls right off the tongue. I've said it for years. Any time, anyone has come to me with questions or concerns about their children, I have piously reminded them that "God doesn't any grandkids. He only has kids."

This past weekend, those words came back to haunt me in ways that I truly never expected. The weekend turned out to be reflective, emotional, fearful, and generally just anxiety-filled.

My Angel Baby got engaged Friday night! It was no surprise to me as her fiance had called in advance, seeking my blessing. So, I knew Friday was the night. Teressa knew. All of Jentry's friends knew. Chad's friends knew. The southern part of metro Nashville knew! Evidently, this guy is quite the romantic sap, and he pulled off quite the Coup. (No doubt this subject will rise again in future posts).

We spent Saturday viewing social media and all the activities of the night. Jentry posted a pic on her FB page with the caption, "I get to keep him forever." I felt that one in my gut!

In addition to that, on Saturday, Big Tuck boarded an Airbus 380, headed to Dubai, with a final destination of Kuwait City. He is a member of Raising Cane's first international "New Restaurant Opening Team."

And that was it! In the blink of an eye, I had to turn my kids over to God. Seemingly, my kids are on the paths that we raised them to be on. My job seems complete, and I am finally seeing that their future rests in God's hands and I am powerless over trying to orchestrate the outcomes.

What a year thus far! My Angel Baby has trekked all over Europe, with a backpack on her back. My wife spent twelve days cruising around the Mediterranean. Tucker was all over the Southwest, opening new restaurants, while preparing to head off to the Persian Gulf. And seemingly, all this occurred without any need of my protection and control. God was in control the entire time. And He provided for their care and protection.

Abruptly, the words I have shared with so many of you got shoved right back down my throat this weekend. I've had to come to grips with the fact that, truly, God Does Not Have Any Grandkids!

For that, I am humbled. But mostly, for that, I am grateful.